Ottoke?!?!

i hate to join any contest again n again..my omma said.."x de rezeki"..but for me..this is does not fair..how come i didn't win only one from 10 contest that i involve..arh..i damn hate it..i feel like i wanna kill myself..aigoo~i'm  very mad right now???urghhhh!?!?!?aku rase cm nk bunuh je owg yg x pilih aku tuh..tgok..kn aku dh type bhase rojak  nie..korean plus malay plus english..tah ape2 lerh aku nie..